Editing

I'm a bit of a compulsive editor. I write dozens and dozens of drafts of every paper. But I'm beginning to see how this will be a problem with my dissertation. I'm revising my proposal at the moment, which comprises about 1/2 to 2/3 of what my final document will hopefully be. I just spent two hours critically reading the whole damn thing and making notes, and still my brain turned to mush about halfway though chapter 4 (of 5). I know people make their living doing this to much longer novels and textbooks and whatnot, but I'm not those people. And I'm beginning to wonder how I'm ever going to be able to get through the whole damn thing once it's actually a whole damn thing. And I feel like it really needs to be edited in one sitting to determine if the whole thing actually hangs together as one coherent document. Sigh.

I haven't quite reached the totally-isolated-out-in-the-ether feeling that this guy once described on his long-since dead podcast, but having so far read my document umpteen gazillion times, I am beginning to feel something for it akin to an old lover. Also, it's sheer existence still sort of amazes me. Every time I print out a new version to edit I feel like rays of light should bounce off of it and somewhere a high-pitched "aaaahhhhh" should be sounding.