Stress Dream

Bleh. Despite being a huge nerd, I don't often dream about math. Last year, after my comps, I spent several weeks trying to solve that last problem. I'd wake up every morning with x- and y-sub-i fluttering behind my eyelids. And last night, not only did I dream about my current research (G-estimation in structural nested failure time models) but I was actually interviewing for yet another job, because I am both crazy and dumb enough to actually do something like that. Bleh.

So this weekend is the big Halloween Party. It's Reese's party, really, his thing, but this summer the boys moved into a smaller place, so this year the shin dig is happening at my place. And we've invited somewhere between 80 and 100 people. Eek! I'm both excited and a little daunted. It reminds me of those parties we used to throw back in Cleveland. Although the heyday of Belmar saw some of the best parties, I'm pretty sure the number of guests never quite reached the size of those events at Ford. Which was good; I think it made our parties better. I was lying in bed the other night, starting to get a tad nervous about the sheer ambition of our party, remembering some of the less positive happenings in Cleveland (the homeless guy who tried to talk his way in, the losers from the party upstairs who drew on the walls and squirted hand cream (we hoped it was hand cream) all over AWB's bed). I know asshole types come in all ages, but I'm hoping most of us have out grown that phase. Or, at the very least, that there's a critical mass of responsible types so that peer pressure keeps behavior within reasonable bounds.

I'm also back to stressing out about school and research. I have a paper due Nov. 13, then two conference submission deadlines, bam! bam! Nov. 15 and 20. And between now and then I'll be in Boston for a week (yay! I get to see April!). Last week I was singing my advisor's praises, because I was freaking out about the impending conference deadlines, and I just felt like my current little project wasn't coming together into something interesting and worth submitting, and she said not to worry and suggested I read a few other articles and ponder some things for a week while she was out of town then we'd regroup and reassess. Well, the regrouping included her suggesting I miraculously come up with an abstract based on implementing three variations of a method that I allegedly took a class in last year but actually don't understand at all. Sigh. She's actually a very good advisor. And I know that if I don't get my shit together in 3 weeks it won't be the end of the world. I've actually been incredibly lucky lately with publications. But it's all been tangential things. Things I'm interested in, but not directly related to my dissertation. And I'm starting to feel like I haven't made any real noticeable progress on that in a while, and it's time to kick my ass into gear...now, to just figure out a way to become smarter between now and November...

I swear this blog isn't going to become all bowling all the time, but the pictures are quick and easy to post, and that's about all I've had time for lately. At least I'm finally healthy again (as I jinx myself just before leaving for the latest gymnastics session and more grubby 3 and 4 year olds...). Seriously, that head cold I was bitching about a few weeks ago turned into a massive infection and I lost my voice for two days. At which point I decided maybe it would be reasonable to seek medical advice. They scared me with the prospect of mono, but thankfully that test came back negative. Instead I got a few days of antibiotics and steroids. I'm lucky - I have health insurance. Actually, the whole situation was pretty ideal - I waltzed into my student health center around 10am (no appointment), told 'em I was sick, and they worked me in 20 minutes later. I got a full work up and blood tests, plus the meds, right there. And a follow-up appointment for a few days later. Meanwhile, fellow students like AWB are stuck googling their symptoms. How fucked up is that? If we can't figure out how to provide affordable insurance for college and graduate students (a population which should be reasonably cheap and easy to insure) how the hell are we going to take care of poor families?

So I was sick during Ahalya's visit, which sucked, but I guess the bonus of being former roommates is that you've already seen some pretty crappy sides of each other, so curling up on the couch all gross and somewhat miserable is acceptable behavior. Aside from the ickiness, her visit was lovely, and it was nice to once again reminisce about good times at Smith House. Oh, and we went to see a local production of The Importance of Being Earnest, which was quite good (except for Gwendolen) and of course, made me miss Footlighters.

Speaking of which, turns out they've kept (and posted!) some very old pics. EMG and Jared - I know you're out there, did you know about this?

Ok, enough procrastinating. Time to drum up some more publicity for NAPW's upcoming summit. Anyone know any Atlanta area midwives, doulas, reproductive health/social justice types?